2011 Is Here and Here Are My Letters

A year ago, I embarked on a blogging adventure and here I am one year later....better than last.

2010 was not ideal for me but it brought me to where I am today. It helped me to grow, though I went through some painful days, it made me realize that my best days are ahead of me. 

So, now here I am 7 days until my 32nd birthday and thinking its time. Time to embark on my future.

I realized that I made some poor decisions over the years and I have a lot to make up for. I wanted to write a letter to those people, you know who you are and why this pertains to you.

I have experienced many things over my lifetime and have come to be who I am today because of all those experiences. Some involved you, some were because of you, some were in spite of you, some were because of your absence, and some were just plain ole stupid. Many times you have reminded me that I am where I am because of myself! I have accepted what I did and regret many things but most of all, I regret never being honest with myself and never realizing that what I wanted and needed were always there. A friend once told me that actions speak louder than words...and I believed that and then I remembered the power of love. Love can be in an action, it can be shown through kisses, hugs, gestures....Love can be spoken, it can be LOUD and ring in your ears with three simple words that are so complex in meaning (I LOVE YOU)...how often do we use those words so simply without merit? When we hang up with our loved one, when we say goodbye, in the thralls of passion....but how often do we say it when it really counts? I missed my opportunity to love you and say it out loud. I'm not afraid of that anymore. I'm ready to love again and be loved in return. I can only hope that the one who is the one...knows it and can say three simple words to me that mean more than an I Love You....those words are...I Forgive You. 

To the others in my life that have been burned in my wrath,

Go! Go forward knowing that I no longer wish you malice. I want the people in my life to be happy and love. Experience life. I want to forgive and not forget....because if I ever forget, I will lose my way and know that I can be pained in such a way. I don't hate you. I just wish you would've known what you caused. But I thank you because without this drama, I wouldn't have found what I know is my happiness. 

God Bless You All...and I look forward to a promising 2011.

Ready To Love Again

Our Decorating Day

This weekend we FINALLY finished decorating the tree and the house. Every day we put it off because it was late and then  we dedicated a day for Christmas! We decorated the tree, the windows, the counter (separated the kitchen from the living room), and then we made homemade Chocolate Chip Cookies! It was a great day!

How are you preparing for the holiday?

The Holiday Season

As this Holiday season is underway, it brings to surface many of things! But this year, this Christmas, I get to start new! Back at home in Williamsburg with my boys and loving my new diggs! Not mention the great friends and family that surround me. I have been in a whirlwind of emotions for the past 3 months, sorting out what is real and what is not. Figuring out where I am in the process and protecting my heart from deceit and betrayal.

I was doing a poor job on that  last one! But then it happened....the moment that everyone said would! The moment when ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! The moment when I no longer long for my past and look ahead yet to the wonderful future I can and will have.

So, this Christmas, I open my heart to new things! Tonight, our tree will make its debut! We will celebrate new beginnings, with a new tradition! And GOD, I can't wait.

This holiday season, I will prevail victorious in my quest for Peace of Mind!

Blah...today sucks!

Ugh, today I woke up and my throat was on FIRE!! I think the stress of all the things going on at once is finally catching up to me. I now have less than a week to finish up on my latest project and I don't know how I am going to do it!

Right now, sitting on my laptop and trying to find words is a challenge. My head is clouded by a cold and my mind is emotionally clouded by stress. I am getting things done but today, today, sucks! lol!

Laundry is in the wash, dishes need to get cleaned, garbage needs to go out, phone calls need to be made and here I am sitting in my bed...and I just can't bring myself to move.

Hopefully, dinner will be here soon and it will help me energize for another night of endless tasks....

The Wonder of Believing in True Love

This weekend was monumental! I got to revisit love and began to believe once again that true love does exist. For a while now, I lost faith and hope that real love was fictional and fantasy that we create as little girls wanting a fairytale. I was asked to bear witness, along with close friends and family, to the beginning of two very important friends' fairytale ending. Happily ever after does exist and they are proof. Its amazing how time and space was something that never phased what was truly real for them...their love! 15 years later, rekindling love lost and realizing that even as children we can find that "one" can exist. They embody all that I want in my life and in love. 

To Jonie and Willie....God has blessed you with one another and now a true symbol of your committment and love for one another in a child! I cried last night in being  honored in sharing these precious moments with you all. With our CK family and all those monumental people who have molded you, it was truly amazing!

Thank you for offering me the opportunity to believe again! YAIN (You're All I Need)...I will take that in my heart with me on my quest for true happiness. 

Besos and congrats again! I can't wait to be a witness at your wedding and to be a Titi to my precious new nephew or niece. Your lives are going to be blessed a million times fold!

Music...what song is your new fave?

LOVE THIS SONG!

Just wanted to share! Leave me one of your new faves!

My world today....Exhausting! Changing!

OMG...I can't wait for this part to be over already! I have been at this house all day and feel like I haven't even put a dent in it! I am so exhausted but I know I have to push through it! I have a goal and I will do it!

I thought I'd have trouble choosing what stays and what goes but I can happily say...I want it all gone, except the bare necessities!

Ever feel like you need to start again with everything new? Like though you are tired and overally exhausted, you push yourself because you know something great will come of it! Well, that's me today. I've been at this house for 10 hours! WOW! Crazy me! But it will be done with time to spare and on the big day...I will feel relaxed and ready..rather than overwhelmed and crazed!

I finally believe that change is good! And its my turn...