Love is a funny thing. You expect it to be easy. You expect it to be a world of roses and laughs and perfect moments that you find only in movies. You expect him to always say the right thing, and always know exactly how you feel, or exactly how to react to it. You expect him to calm you down when you’re yelling or to chase you when you run away. You expect so much that you feel entirely, utterly defeated when something doesn’t exactly match up with all your plans. But that’s the thing. Love isn’t a plan. It doesn’t have a certain beginning and it certainly has no end or visible finish line to those deeply in it.
Love is so incredibly messy. People around you can’t comprehend why you do the things you do, or why you fight so hard for something that seems to cause you so much pain, because simply, they can’t see. They can’t see the invisible ring of insanity that surrounds you when you’re in love. It’s inconvenient and painful and devastating at times, but we can’t live without it. What you don’t learn is how hard love is. How much work it takes. How much of ourselves we have to put into it. How it isn’t worth it until we are complete and utter idiots about it.
Love isn’t him calming you down when you yell. It’s him yelling, just as loud, just as hard, right back at you, right in your face to wake you up and to keep you grounded. It isn’t him bringing you roses everyday or cute things that make your relationship appear more presentable.
It’s after a long fight, that drains the life and bones right out of you both, and yet him showing up at your door the next morning anyway. It’s not him saying all the right things or knowing exactly how to handle you. So no, it’s not her caressing your hair and telling you that everything’s going to be alright. It’s him standing there, admitting he’s just as scared as you are. You have to remember that with love, you’re not the only one involved. You’ve unknowingly put your life, your heart into the palms of another person’s hand and said “here. Do what you will. Mash it into mince meat. Or forget I ever handed it to you. As long as you have it.”
It makes us crazy. It makes us invisible and it erases all the lines that we shouldn’t cross. Because love isn’t about fencing ourselves in; feeling safe, feeling sure about the future. It’s about scaring the crap out of every nerve in our body, but pushing forward anyway. Because all the fighting and all the tears and all the uncertainty is worth it. And it’s a lot better than being 100% happy without someone to show us that there is a world of difference between feeling ‘happy’ and feeling whole.
Life is a challenge, and so is love. Things never come easy in life; if they do, memories are rare, suffering won’t get you through the tough times, there’s nothing to look back on. There’s no mistakes that you learn from. In the end, it’s all worth it. - Excerpt from "Life is a Beautiful Struggle"
When you stop and take a look at the loves of your life, you will look and see that holding on to those memories is what made you the person you are today. That, finding that kind of love, is worth fighting for. It may not be the perfect situation but eventually it will be just right for you.
Sometimes, perception is wayyyy off! Sometimes, people are not seeing what is really there. It takes two to make it work, it takes two to letting go, it takes two to move on...Think about it this way, when you get married, two people vow to be one. When you get divorced, two people agree to part. So, when you want to question whether you are wrong for holding on to that love you know still exists, don't question, don't allow to be questioned. You have no one to answer to and no one to seek approval from. That feeling exists because despite life's curveballs, love transcends. Happiness is your perception, not someone else's opinion.
